Reflections from Dad

Dad took some time to write out some thoughts:

The most common question I'm asked lately is: "How's Tina?" followed by "How are you doing?"

I usually reply, "I think I'm doing okay."

Through this whole journey of sickness, it goes generally okay unless you focus on yourself. It's not hard to take care of the love of your life. It gives you a purpose. I'm convinced you need a reason to get up every morning.

We (Tina and I) were discussing how I will go on when she passes on to the next life. It certainly is not easy to talk about, as there is a whole range of emotions that come up. Tina suggested I write some of these down, so here I am at 4:00 a.m. writing. Don't get alarmed - I have always been an early riser.

I'm convinced that death was not part of the original creation, and that is why we have a hard time dealing with it. We were created to live eternally (forever) and when death looms at the door, we are uncomfortable. The Scripture that gives me great comfort in this is the story of Jesus when he agonized over His upcoming death in the Garden of Gethsemane. Even my Saviour and friend struggled with death and dying - and He is God. What a comfort.

When I look ahead, I'm often fearful about how I will deal with the loss of Tina. Scripture says "The two will become one" and I am well aware of this after 41 years of marriage. So when I lose her it will be like losing part of me. I don't want to dwell on that a lot because it makes me sad and anxious. Instead, I will dwell on the verse, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" and "I will never leave you or forsake you."

The scriptures have great promises, and I can't imagine living without these. The promise of eternal life gives us a reason to go on and to share with others the wonderful work of our Saviour. "For God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life." What a promise - that whoever is you and me.
Bert

Thankfulness

Mom has been reflecting a lot in the last days and weeks, and took some time to write down some of her thoughts. 

As I think back over the last number of weeks I feel so blessed and thankful.  My cup run runs over.  

Psalm 23:5

You prepare a table before me 

in the presence of my enemies.

You anoint my head with oil; 

my cup overflows. 

First of all I'm so thankful that the medications I'm on have stabilized my condition.  I realize this is not a long term solution but for now I can enjoy life comfortably.

I feel so blessed that Bert is so there for me - that's a love that goes deep.  Ok, so he gets to see me at my best but also those other times which I won't go into but you know what I mean.

I'm so thankful that all of my children and grandchildren are now around me and we're able to spend quality family time together. I'm so thankful for my siblings - we have made it a priority to spend quality time together and it's been really fun!

I'm thankful for the wonderful birthday I was able to celebrate - my 65th - way overboard, but such fun - the flowers, the balloons, the bird show, people dropping in, the birthday cards - I felt so loved!

Mom and the baby lamb on her birthday

And having my own personal social convener!  Whoever heard of that!  But sister Wilma is doing a great job!  Ok, so we had to come up with a title that suits her personality - she doesn't do body parts!  So we do outings a lot.  And even a trip through Exeter to see how the new A&W is coming along can be an outing! And she's a great hostess when friends and family come to visit.  Oh and did I mention, she's also a great gardener?  I tell you, our cozy little home is as cozy on the outside as it is on the inside right now!

And I'm thankful for a wheelchair - now I can really go on outings without having to tire myself all out.  We're hoping to visit the Toronto Zoo in the next few weeks and I'll be able to roll along!

But best of all, I'm finding that it's not the big ticket items that thrill me, but it's the relational things that bring such great joy.  Watching the grandchildren at play, listening to them, clowning around a bit, spending time with each of our kids, reminiscing over pictures, having time to  do some  projects, visiting with special friends, you get the picture.  

When all else is stripped away, we still have each other. As 1 Cor. 13 says "And now these 3 remain: faith, hope and love, but the greatest of these is love."  That is certainly my experience right now.

And so I am thankful again today.
Tina

Lupins in Mom's garden - she's always wanted to grow them and this year they bloomed!

A rhubarb pie Mom and Aunt Wilma made together, with some help from a friend!
They ate this on their siblings outing to Stratford. 

Sparkly toes.

"Grandma, can I have toes like that?"

To the greenhouse with sisters (and cousin Wina).

Baby Owen, here from New Zealand.

Harmony's Home!

Well, Mom now has all six of her kids and all her grandkids within driving distance of her! Harmony and Marco and their three kids arrived very late Sunday night. On Monday afternoon, most of us wandered over to Sandra and Peter's house where they are staying. It wasn't planned, but more and more of us asked Sandra if we could drop by to see them. So in the end, most of us were together for an impromptu barbeque! Sandra had been planning to make spaghetti for supper, which changed to chili as more people wanted to come, and then hotdogs and hamburgers. Harmony can't get (Canadian) hotdogs in New Zealand, so she was pretty happy with this.

Harmony and Mom. Hugs to be together again - New Zealand is so far away!

And hugs for Kelsey and Morgan  (and the other grandkids) too!

Hugs for Morgan!

Peter and Sandra have a trailer on their property where Harmony and Marco can stay.
It is really nice. They even have lounging chairs, which are great for
relaxing on after almost 24 hours of travelling the day before. 

Mom got to meet Owen, Harmony's new baby, for the first time. It was an emotional moment.

The kids (cousins) played and played and played.

Kelsey likes her cousin AJ. She followed him around wherever he went.
He is very patient with his girl cousin!

The guys went for a quick canoe ride before supper (of course!).

Lining up for hotdogs and hamburgers.

Harmony finally gets some hotdogs! She threatened to eat nothing but
hotdogs and drink rootbeer once she got here. So far, so good!

James isn't certain about sharing Grandma with this new cousin.

I got to hold Owen too. I went there when he was just a few weeks old. My, has he changed!

We had a great afternoon, just being together. These are blessings that we do not
 take for granted. We don't know what Mom's journey will be in the
next weeks and months, but we do know that we are blessed to be together. 

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Mom and her siblings met in Stratford on Saturday to have a picnic, look at the swans and go out for supper (well, Mom brought her magic bullet and pureed the soup). The weather was perfect. Mom had a wheelchair to ride in so she wouldn't get tired. They had a good time building memories.

Coffee in the park

Coffee, rhubarb pie, sparkling juice, and perhaps some wine.

A swan

Sisters

Everyone enjoyed photographing the birds.

A mother duck and her ducklings.

Let's try the slide! 

Big kids! 

Thursday, May 17, 2012

Mom went to her doctor in London this morning. Everything is holding steady, so they are going to continue on with the meds and strategies that are working! Mom said she'd like to enjoy her time with her family, so the doctor was fine to keep things as they are, with some slight med adjustments. Mom is feeling well, and will go back to the doctor in four weeks. So this is good news, a bit of a breather. We are thankful!

On the way home from London, they stopped in Lucan to take pictures with Mom's friend, a rooster. This is at a place that sells creative garden sculptures.

This was in the back of the rooster. Mom writes: "Have you ever seen a rooster lay eggs?"

They also stopped by a local farm to see the eagle's nest they have been watching. The little ones are getting much bigger! That's the adult, sitting on the left, while the little ones are in the nest.

Aunt Wilma has been at Mom and Dad's every day and has been a great help, doing dishes, making food, doing housework, and mostly being Mom's Social Convener.  

You can pray for continued well-being for Mom and for Dad and Aunt Wilma as they help her. Pray also that we would have a really wonderful time as a family together. We are looking forward to Harmony and Marco arriving with their three kids late Sunday night!

Mom was listening to this song on the way home from London, and wants to share it with you. It has been very meaningful to us lately. Even in the face of physical weakness and illness, we have great hope.

Birthday Party Part 2

On Saturday, some of us gathered at Mom and Dad's house to celebrate her birthday with a bird show. Why a bird show? Well, honestly, it's a little hard to know what to get the lady. Eating out isn't fun, going out to a play means travelling and sitting too long, and things, well, she has mostly everything she wants. At one point I thought, maybe she would like 65 wind-up chickens in her house. Or maybe not!

One thing Mom has been talking a lot about lately is eagles. When Mom and Dad were in Florida, they visited a nesting pair and watched the babies grow up. Many times, people have encouraged her with the verses from Isaiah 40: 27-31 (NIV):

Why do you complain, Jacob?

    Why do you say, Israel,

“My way is hidden from the Lord;

    my cause is disregarded by my God”? 

Do you not know?

    Have you not heard? Do you not know?

    Have you not heard? 

The Lord is the everlasting God,

    the Creator of the ends of the earth. 

He will not grow tired or weary, 

    and his understanding no one can fathom. 

He gives strength to the weary 

    and increases the power of the weak.

Even youths grow tired and weary,

    and young men stumble and fall; 

but those who hope in the Lord

    will renew their strength. 

They will soar on wings like eagles; 

    they will run and not grow weary,

    they will walk and not be faint.

Eagles have become a symbol to Mom that the Lord has not forgotten her, but will comfort and strengthen her. Several weeks ago, Mom and Dad were on the way to Emergency (Mom was in severe pain) and overhead they saw an eagle flying. It comforted them, reminding them that the Lord was with them, even in this time of uncertainty and pain. 

So for her birthday, we organized a bird show - with an eagle - to come to her back yard! I heard of James Cowan of Canadian Raptor Conservancy and as it happened, he was in Lucan on May 12 - just in time for her birthday! He brought five birds with him - including a bald eagle.

James Cowan

Grandkids waiting for the show

The first bird, a Harris Hawk.

We're watching with interest...

James flies the bird around the crowd...

...right over Paul and my heads! It was a very interactive show.

The next bird out is a great horned owl.

Isn't he beautiful?

Crouching to fly...

...right at Peter! He took this photo. It brushed his head as it went over.
Peter said, "Owl have to sue you."
James replied, without missing a beat, "I didn't know feathers hurt." :)

Watching the show.

A red-tailed hawk.

It gets its name from its brick-red tail.

Mom watched sometimes from her chair, sometimes from a closer vantage point with Aunt Wilma.

An American Kestrel, which used to be called a sparrow hawk.
It had beautiful markings, and can eat a phenomenal amount of mice.

It squawked the whole time it was out. A noisy little thing!

Then, the eagle, the star of the show. This is a bald eagle.

After the show, James let us get close to the birds and take photos.

Mom and Dad

Mom and Aunt Sadie

Getting close to the owl!

Grandpa and Julie enjoyed the show too. Dad handed out suckers after the show.

Then coffee and an indoor hot dog roast with some of us. It was a great day!

Mom, may you rise on wings like eagles.
May the Lord give you strength for your journey.